The past month has challenged me in all areas, mind, body and spirit. I could blame it on Mercury retrograde, or my post conference funk, but whatever the reason, July took me out! In fact, you could say I’d been hit by a cosmic 2′x4′ (nod to my friend Lisa Wilder for that visual! Ouch!)
Blocked and doubtful, Lizzie on full-blown loudspeaker about my work and what’s next, and then because that wasn’t enough, blindsided by an inflamed disc in my low back.
Really God? You thought that was a good idea?
And just like that, I fell down the slippery slope to the dark side.
The dark side ain’t pretty.
It’s that dark and scary neighbourhood in your head; the dark alley your mother warned you about as a kid. Believe me, you do not want to go there alone.
But I did, and I quickly slid down that slope like a 6 year old on a water slide!
And then I did what I coach my clients not to do – I beat myself up about it! Yup, I so did.
Until this morning when I got smacked upside the head by this,
“Mostly, when you approve of your weaknesses, you give yourself permission to pursue your genius.” – Danielle LaPorte
My shadow quivered with a sudden understanding that the end was near.
Damn, I could be jinxing it by saying so as Mercury doesn’t shift for another week, but what the hell, I’m going all in as I answer Danielle LaPorte’s burning question,
What do you suck at?
In going to the dark side willingly, resistance and make-wrong disappeared and space, glorious space appeared like a long-lost lover.
So here goes:
I suck at being patient. I really do. Patience is a virtue I do not possess, and I’m no longer going to apologize for that. I was even born two months early, and as my mom likes to say, I’ve been impatient from the beginning!
I suck at letting go. I’ve done a lot of work on this one and I’m much better now (I sound like a recovering addict, don’t I?) But the truth is sometimes I let things fester. I hang on just a little bit longer than I know is good for me. I let my attachment get the best of me. Big time suckage for this one.
Bookkeeping and paperwork slay me. I suck at both. I fall behind, I come up with excuses that I’d shoot down in a second if I was coaching me and I often have to clean things up in this area. Thank God my bookkeeper is amazing and loves me!
I suck at following the rules. Don’t know what happened because I was the good girl, straight A student till university when all hell broke loose. Can I blame this on art school? Seriously, do not tell me what to do. It won’t go well.
I also suck at small talk. I don’t give a crap about the superficial. Give me your spirit, your fire, your passion. Otherwise, move away and talk to the schmuck on the other side of the room who wants to thrust his business card at you. I want connection and I refuse to settle for schmooze.
There is more suckage, but I’m going to stop because I want this to be an opening rather than a wallowing.
Danielle says, “When we put our weaknesses in plain language and clear view, we can see where we need to become more conscious, and how our so called “shortcomings” point to our true strengths.”
In the end, that’s what really matters.
Over to you:
What do you suck at?
Respond in the comments and enter to win a Vision Walk session!
Inspired by Danielle LaPorte’s Burning Question: What do you suck at?